'Absolute unit': Escaped Highland cow delays trains after walking onto tracks

Commuters held up for around an hour after trespasser escapes country park

Jon Sharman

A hulking Highland cow held up train passengers near Glasgow after escaping from a country park, leading rail staff to dub the beast an “absolute unit”.

The disruption also set off a deluge of bad puns, with ScotRail pledging to get the escaped livestock “moooooved as soon as we can”.

Glasgow City Council, whose workers were dispatched to help, also got in on the action early on Tuesday morning after a number of the animals escaped from Pollok Country Park.

“The coos have been retrieved and moooved back to Pollok Park. Our cooncil team are working with rail staff to check where the breach in the fence is,” the local authority tweeted.

ScotRail released a still image from one of its CCTV cameras, and tweeted: “Absolute unit spotted on the track at Pollokshaws West. Sorry if you’re being delayed due to this.”

Video later posted by Network Rail Scotland showed the cow being led away from the tracks by a person holding a bucket of feed.

Commuters were delayed for about an hour.

The “absolute unit” meme originated on Twitter, when in 2017 a user posted an image of Goring Hotel managing director David Morgan-Hewitt alongside Queen Elizabeth II with the caption, ”in awe at the size of this lad. absolute unit”.

The phrase has since been used to describe any animal, person or even cuddly toy that is deemed remarkably large.

A Highland cow caused rush-hour delays to trains around Glasgow after escaping from a country park.

Rail operator ScotRail initially tweeted about “reports of a couple of Highland Cows on the railway line at Busby”, in East Renfrewshire, at 8.48am on Tuesday.

However, at least one of the animals, described as an “absolute unit”, was spotted on the tracks at Pollokshaws West, which is on the same line and near Pollok Country Park.

In a series of tweets, ScotRail said: “We’ve had reports of a couple of Highland Cows on the railway line at #Busby. We think they’re on the run from Pollok Park… We’ll get them moooooved as soon as we can. Thanks for your patience.

“Absolute unit spotted on the track at Pollokshaws West. Sorry if you’re being delayed due to this.

“@NetworkRailScot track staff on their way to attempt to encourage these coos to mooove back to the park.

“It’s not safe to attempt to pass the area at the moment. In this picture, you can see trains on both tracks are being held. We really appreciate your patience if you’re on board either train or at a station waiting.”

We've moved the animal clear of the railway assisted by @GlasgowCC staff. @ScotRail services are returning to normal, though there is some disruption ongoing at Glasgow Central while trains which were unable to depart are moved from the station. pic.twitter.com/13Imucs0h1

— Network Rail Scotland (@NetworkRailSCOT) January 14, 2020

The firm also said “services are being disrupted into Glasgow Central High Level at the moment due to several line issues across the Network”.

Network Rail said: “Our teams are beginning to arrive on site to deal with this issue and mooove this Highland Coo so trains can run again safely.”

The organisation then posted a video showing the animal being enticed off the line with a bucket of food.

A Glasgow City Council spokeswoman said the cow had been “retrieved safely” by staff from the park just before 10am.

She added the council was in contact with ScotRail to determine where the creature “breached the fence” and was also checking if it was more than one animal, with reports of a cow’s appearance in Busby.

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