By Paul Wallis
Published June 25, 2023
Queen guitarist Brian May lights up the Platinum Party outside Buckingham Palace.
— © AFP/File
Yes, a focus group could dictate your entertainment. New research has achieved a 97% accuracy in predicting what people like in music. This isn’t the same thing as playlists predicated on your past history. This is a result of machine learning processing neurological and physical responses.
This is neuroforecasting, or somewhat less elegantly, total bonehead behaviorism a la mode. Psychology for plodders. The absolute nadir of insight into humanity.
Better still, this could be applied to all forms of entertainment. Formulaic crud can be monetized using this method. You just mass—produce mainstream, and you’re a market-savvy genius. It’s exactly like media sales pitches. They bought it before, so they’ll buy it again.
What future bliss awaits? Trundle furiously to your playlist and be enriched by its utter predictability, perhaps? Another somewhat self-serving description of this invasive, senseless approach to human experience could be “guaranteed stagnation of the arts”.
I think the word is “Meh”. That overworked word may also be an overstatement in this case. This has been going on for years. We already have plenty of that stuff in ponderous patches, recycled raps, and hip-hopeless dreck in the streaming charts. The difference is this is proven by neuroscience.
I guess it boils down to whatever cookie-cutter crap choices you have. Some more schmaltzy garbage? Or some hard rock schmaltzy garbage? There can be no real choices if that’s how you decide what to market.
There’s an irony rattling around here. The most successful musical acts and songs in history are all unique. They’re one-offs. So if neuroforecasting can predict a playlist, or a pre-market sample, it can’t predict artists. It can generate a shopping list – to be fair, most people can’t – but not trends or emerging art forms.
There are places this tech simply can’t access. Meaning that mindblowing unforgettable performances can’t even be on the map for prediction. That song that stays with you forever isn’t registerable on this basis.
Anyway – What’s the point of predicting after the fact? Of course, all this is to be used to predict sales. We’ll leave out the bit about sub-sectored transient demographics and social environments. What you like as a tween isn’t going to be what you like 5 or 10 years later.
This tech has all the hallmarks of yet another media psychology tyranny-bureaucracy in progress. It’s a good fit for all those little inclusions in a personal profile that seem to pop up in your personal information at the wrong times. It could also be used for mapping “neurodivergence”, that terrible crime against statistics.
For a rather banal example – You like whatever type of music or art, therefore you’re neurodivergent, you unspeakable brute, you. You have been known to like jazz. Therefore you’re not the person we need for a busboy or executive sycophant, so there.
I’m looking forward to neuroforecasting being applied to comedy. People obviously like references to bodily functions, non-existent sex, and slapstick. Let’s do thousands of hours of that instead of anything else. Makes you wonder how Fox News will survive, doesn’t it?
Neuroforecasting in this form is a target at point blank range. The target is unmissable. Is that good enough?
Yes, a focus group could dictate your entertainment. New research has achieved a 97% accuracy in predicting what people like in music. This isn’t the same thing as playlists predicated on your past history. This is a result of machine learning processing neurological and physical responses.
This is neuroforecasting, or somewhat less elegantly, total bonehead behaviorism a la mode. Psychology for plodders. The absolute nadir of insight into humanity.
Better still, this could be applied to all forms of entertainment. Formulaic crud can be monetized using this method. You just mass—produce mainstream, and you’re a market-savvy genius. It’s exactly like media sales pitches. They bought it before, so they’ll buy it again.
What future bliss awaits? Trundle furiously to your playlist and be enriched by its utter predictability, perhaps? Another somewhat self-serving description of this invasive, senseless approach to human experience could be “guaranteed stagnation of the arts”.
I think the word is “Meh”. That overworked word may also be an overstatement in this case. This has been going on for years. We already have plenty of that stuff in ponderous patches, recycled raps, and hip-hopeless dreck in the streaming charts. The difference is this is proven by neuroscience.
I guess it boils down to whatever cookie-cutter crap choices you have. Some more schmaltzy garbage? Or some hard rock schmaltzy garbage? There can be no real choices if that’s how you decide what to market.
There’s an irony rattling around here. The most successful musical acts and songs in history are all unique. They’re one-offs. So if neuroforecasting can predict a playlist, or a pre-market sample, it can’t predict artists. It can generate a shopping list – to be fair, most people can’t – but not trends or emerging art forms.
There are places this tech simply can’t access. Meaning that mindblowing unforgettable performances can’t even be on the map for prediction. That song that stays with you forever isn’t registerable on this basis.
Anyway – What’s the point of predicting after the fact? Of course, all this is to be used to predict sales. We’ll leave out the bit about sub-sectored transient demographics and social environments. What you like as a tween isn’t going to be what you like 5 or 10 years later.
This tech has all the hallmarks of yet another media psychology tyranny-bureaucracy in progress. It’s a good fit for all those little inclusions in a personal profile that seem to pop up in your personal information at the wrong times. It could also be used for mapping “neurodivergence”, that terrible crime against statistics.
For a rather banal example – You like whatever type of music or art, therefore you’re neurodivergent, you unspeakable brute, you. You have been known to like jazz. Therefore you’re not the person we need for a busboy or executive sycophant, so there.
I’m looking forward to neuroforecasting being applied to comedy. People obviously like references to bodily functions, non-existent sex, and slapstick. Let’s do thousands of hours of that instead of anything else. Makes you wonder how Fox News will survive, doesn’t it?
Neuroforecasting in this form is a target at point blank range. The target is unmissable. Is that good enough?
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