The $13 Billion Sewage Plant

by Jimmy Coleman / February 28th, 2026

Oh what a relief it is to see that 13 Billion of our tax dollars, give or take, are well spent. The Empire’s newest and largest Aircraft Carrier, the USS Gerald R. Ford is swimming in its own excrement. News around the world reports the Ford is having major sewage problems. Evidently the overflow affects 650 Necessaries, aka, toilets, aboard the Gerald R. As scuttlebutt has it, the Captain restricted their use among the 5,000 sailors aboard. Not sure just how the Navy’s high brass plans on enforcing such a restriction.

In a number 1 emergency, which in this case it undoody’ably is, instead of using the Head the male members of the crew are encouraged to hang their tallywackers out the portholes. It has been suggested the gals use spare wash buckets. A boatload doing a number 2 presents a whole nuther problem. The passageways are already open laterines.

Fortunately, the Ford has just docked in Israel, where help is just around the corner. Israel produces more shitsky than any other place on God’s green earth — even more than Senator Lyndsey Graham, Donald Trump, and US Ambassador Mike Huckabee combined. There’s yet hope for the USS Gerald Ford. The Zionists know how to dish it out, discharging Epstenian ordure to the four corners like it was manna from on high.

Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead, hopefully in the upcoming battle with Iran and the Houthis, the Ford isn’t forced to make any sudden hard-a-starboard (right) or hard-a-port (left) turns while maneuvering. The USS Harry S. Truman already lost two F/A-18 Super Hornets in the Red Sea after they slipped off the deck while the ship dodged Houthi missiles. A deck awash in muck and not just on the Poop Deck, only increases the chance of F-35Cs, Growlers, and E2-Hawkeyes, not to mention more than a few sailors slipping overboard… either consigned to Davy Jones Locker or limping back home, an event that would not fare well among the American citizenry. Just saying…

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Jimmy R. Coleman is a former President of Garon Inc, a computer consulting company, but his real work started after he began his quest to find an answer to a rather simple question - “Why is it seemingly impossible to have peace in the Middle East?” Twenty plus years have gone by – the answer proving more difficult and elusive than the question. His research has taken him to the four corners of the globe, spanning centuries, covering the rise and fall of empires, cultures and religions. He has relied on some of the best experts in their respective areas, historians, theologians, political and military mindsets, and radical thinkers from the left and right, from Zionist, Jihadist and proponents of End Times eschatology, a journey that has helped frame his thinking, not as an expert who sees the trees, but as someone with a more generalist viewpoint of the forest. Read other articles by Jimmy.