Hendrick's Gin Wants You to Know It Saved These Rare and Near-Extinct Cucumbers for Capitalism

The price of being rescued from near-extinction is, apparently, $48.

By Jody Serrano
Yesterday 8:00AM

The Gagon Cucumber.

Image: Courtesy of Hendrick’s Gin

I must admit, I’m not a big fan of cucumbers. However, I certainly don’t want to see cucumbers go the way of the dodo. That’s why, when Hendrick’s Gin informed me that it had “brought some of the most rare and peculiar cucumbers from around the globe back from the brink of extinction,” I thought it was cool.

“Good for you, Hendrick’s Gin!” I thought, thinking that these cucumbers were going to a special garden or whatnot to ensure they were protected. Alas, it was foolish of me to think that the folks behind Hendrick’s Gin, the distiller and distributor William Grant & Sons, would do something simply for the good of the cucumbers. Because money.

That’s right, these cucumbers aren’t going to be preserved, they’re going to be sold as “Hendrick’s Curious Cucumber Collection” for $48. That’s the price of being rescued from extinction.

Look, I get it. Even though I’m full of anxiety these days about how our consumerist ways are wrecking the planet, I know that we live in a capitalist society. I probably wouldn’t have thought much of it if Hendrick’s Gin simply announced that its new collection featured rare cucumbers from around the world.

But, saying that you brought these cucumbers “back from the brink of extinction” only to announce that you’re selling them in the same sentence seems kind of hypocritical to me.

According to the Hendrick’s press release, it seems that these cucumbers have been restored to a sufficient enough scale that allows them to be sold. Again, nice! I’m happy that these rare cucumbers are no longer in imminent danger. Yet, to bring back cucumbers that are on “the brink of extinction” and then have your next order of business be to start selling them seems... peculiar. Jurassic Park, anyone?

All in all, don’t try to sell capitalism as saving the planet. There is at least one good thing that came out of Hendrick Gin’s endeavor: a nifty look at lots of strange cucumbers.

The “Cutecumber Lemonade” cocktail made with the cucamelon cucumber.

Image: Courtesy of Hendrick’s Gin

And finally, we see capitalism embodied in a photo. The “Cutecumber Lemonade” cocktail is a spin off one of the distiller’s most popular drinks.

A Hendrick’s ambassador calls it “The Cutecumber Lemonade.”

Cool. Now I don’t care how good your lemonade is, don’t put the cucumbers you just saved in danger again.